Using body language to flirt

Conversation is key when you are talking to someone you are interested in for the first time. The dialog needs support though. Below are five effective non verbalcommunication tips to help you out no matter what you talk about. If your body does not convey a sense that you really are what you say you are, or act the way you say you act, then the person you are talking to will pick up on your unvoiced cues and move on.  Subconsciously you more than like wise would do the same in a similar situation.  You know when you get a funny feeling when something does not pass the smell test.  Someone says one thing, but you get a strong feeling what they are saying does not match the truth.  So imagine if you go up and talk to a man or woman as if you are a confident person who is comfortable making new friends, yet you are acting jittery, shy and all around awkward.   You can avoid this however.

1. Eye Contact - you must make solid eye contact. This does not mean you have to burn a hole through the person you are speaking with your eyes. Just make sure you are looking them in the face most of the time.You can occasionally glance away. In fact this is good so you do not seem too intense. Remember, this is not a starring contest either, so blink like you would normally.

2. Smile - Smiling is a sign of welcomeness. When you do not smile it can indicate disinterest, sadness, anger, etc. With that being said, if the person you are approaching is not smiling do not be scared.You are trying to change whatever they are feeling to happiness/welcomeness and get them to smile. Since you are approaching them, you must be smiling first.

3. Posture -How you carry yourself is important. Picture a Drill Sergeant saying, "head up, back straight, shoulders back." That is a strong posture. Slouching, hunching, head looking down, shoulders sagging are weak posture. Weak posture shows lack of self confidence. Lack of self confidence hurts your chances of successful interaction.

4. Speech - If you are excited, one way to not tip it off is to not hurry your speech. Always speak slowly enough to be clearly understood, but not so slow that the person you are talking to thinks you are talking down to them. Speak loudly enough to clearly be heard, but not so loud it is obnoxious. Think of how you would like to be spoken to.

5. Poise - Poise is like posture, only in less a physical sense, and more a mental sense. Always remember, this is nothing serious. This is not life or death. This is not a job interview. This does not affect your survival. Be relaxed. Treat it like it is a game. Enjoy the experience. Essentially this is the overall package of everything put together.